The Anti-Picnic Alliance
by Mia Angel
Summary: Okay, I really suck at writing reviews... anyway, there is an Annual Picnic Day, that the Dragonslayers must attend, but, in rememberance of the previous year's food poisonings (Allen's shampoo smoothies and Millerna's mushroom jello) they guys decide to
1. The Forming of the Alliance

"Mmmph Hello everyone! This is what I hope to be a continuing chapter thing, if I get enough reviews… 

And…um…I wrote it in attempt to get over the stupid writer's block that I got when I was writing one of my other stories, and when I read it over, I figured that I might as well post it up! So, here it is, and enjoy! J 

Disclamer: I don't own Escaflowne, or any of the characters mentioned…but if whoever owns them would like to give them to me for my birthday, I would be very, very happy! J 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~*****~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 

"Mmmph!! Gerrof of me!!" mumbled Dalet, trying to shake Chesta off of him. 

"Get up you stupid sleepy head! Up!! UP!!!" yelled the blond-haired boy, tugging on the other boy's covers in an attempt to wake him up. All Dalet did though, was kick vigorously and whack Chesta with his pillow, making the latter grow more impatient by the second. 

"Up!! Up I say!! And stop hitting me!! Just get up! UP, UP, UP, UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" He yelled, completely frustrated. 

"Up, up and awaaaaayyyyy!!!" giggled Guimel as he poked his head through the door, grinning. Gatti's head popped in beside his, and in a moment they were both in the room. 

"Tut-tut-tut! Time to wake up sleeping beauty!!" Gatti shrieked, as him and Guimel joined Chesta in attacking Dalet, who, surprisingly enough was still half-asleep and refused to get up. He struggled like mad, but after a lengthy battle was dragged out of bed by the other three, and found himself wrapped up in a blanket and being sat on. Chesta, Gatti and Guimel panted heavily, as they sat on a befallen Dalet, congratulating each other on succesfully getting their comrade out of bed. Gatti glanced at the clock. 

"Wow! Only half an hour! We made it in record time!!!" YEA!!" 

The guys wooped and cheered, giving each other high fives. Then, settling down, Chesta became aware that Dalet was not stirring anymore underneath them. Carefully, motioning the other guys to be quiet, he took the blanket off of the boy's face. To their utter astonishment and frustration, he was peacefully asleep, breathing heavily through his nose. (Geez, who wouldn't be breathing heavily, if they had three guys sitting on top of them!!). Amidst their groans and sobs, Migel walked into the room, nearly tripping over the congregation on the floor. 

"Um…dare I ask what is going on here? Or should I just leave quietly, and try and forget that I saw this disturbing scene?" he asked the guys sprawled on the floor with a slight bewilderment. Guimel scoffed, nodding his head at the peacefully snoozing Dalet. 

"We struggled with this kicking male of a sleeping beauty for a good half an hour, got him out of bed, and then he just falls asleep on us!! After getting us all black and blue! And we were so happy, too, that we actually got him out of bed in under an hour!!" he wailed. Chesta mumbled something very unrefined under his breath, massaging his bruised shin. Gatti was busy flicking Dalet's nose with vigor, while saying something of the sort of "…this is for one bruise, and this is for the other, and that is for pushing me off the bed…", while Dalet did not show any notice of pain or discomfort, drooling a little on the floor. 

Migel took his time to laugh at them…very loudly…for a very long time…nearly causing him to cry with mirth… Then, he motioned for them to wait, and (still laughing) stumbled out of the room. The three (awake) Dragonslayers were left sitting on the floor with the "there-goes-my-self-esteem-today" looks, while another (asleep) Dragonslayer was slumbering away happily. 

In a few minutes, the door banged open, and Migel shuffled back in, huffing and puffing under the weight of a very large metal bucket, which was apparently full of water. He heaved it onto the floor, and sighed with relief, looking at the other guys with a "betcha-you-didn't-think-of-this" smirk and plopped down on the closest bed. Chesta, Guimel and Gatti seemed as happy as little children who have just been offered a lifetime supply of candy and a pass to Disneyland. They rushed to the bucket, and after finding out that the water was ice-cold, they became even more delighted. But a frown crossed Gatti's face. 

"If we soak him here, then the room will get wet, and Lord Folken will be mad at us!" 

"Yea, he might even go as far as to **raise his voice** and **frown**!!" added Guimel. Everyone thought that over for a second or so, and after deciding that seeing Lord Folken act like that would just be too much of a shock, they agreed on carrying Dalet and the bucket to the bathroom. 

"Okay men, take your positions!" commanded Migel (as he was carrying the pail, he assumed the role of the commander) "Chesta, take the left leg, Guimel take the right! Gatti, you take the arms! REAADY?? Liiiiiift! And left….left….left, right, left!" The little procession took off down the hallway, towards the bathroom and showers. Migel felt himself in full swing. 

"Piiiick up the pace! Don't dawdle! Backs straight…and….hut, two three four!! Hut, two, three, four!!" Though, after receiving a good-aimed kick from Guimel, he proceeded to shut up, and was silent all the way to the showers. The only command that was heard from him was a triumphant "ATTACK!!!!!" as the contents of the bucket were dropped onto the poor, unsuspecting Dalet. 

The soldier jumped up so high into the air, that it was a wonder that he did not go through the ceiling. As he lay sputtering and coughing (yet completely awake) on the ground, the other four were rolling around on the floor, almost dying from laughter, and literally crying. 

"I….ahaha…I ha-haven't…lahahaha…..la-a-ughed so well since….since…since Viole dropped and bowl of porridge on Lord Dilandau's head!!!" wheezed Gatti, trying to stand up, and falling back down with a new shriek of laughter. 

"Oh, you really found it that amusing, did you?" a chilling voice penetrated the bathroom. The Dragonslayers scrambled to stand up, facing a towel-clad Dilandau. 

"Umm…we… we did not n-notice you Sir…" stuttered Migel, glancing nervously at their commander. 

"No wonder…you were having to much fun too…" he smirked, and after thinking something over for a few seconds he continued, "Well, I am afraid your fun is over for today…for it's the Annual Picnic Day!!!!!" Dilandau laughed evilly, then threw a boot at a wall and yelled "I HATE IT!!!!!!!! I HATE IT!!!!!!!! AND FOLKEN CONFISCATED ALL OF MY FLAMETHROWERS!!!!! EVEN MY MATCHES!! EVERYTHING!!!!!!!! I CAN'T BURN A THING DOWN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WE ARE DOOMED TO GO!!! DOOMED I TELL YOU!!!!" breaking down, he ran into the nearest shower stall, and turned on the water. Amid the splashes and gurgles the stunned Dragonslayers could hear him cursing and yelling (and occasionally, sobbing). 

Chesta sank to the floor. 

"No….No, it can't be….Not the Annual Picnic Day!! I HATE it!!!!!!!" he wailed, slamming his fist onto the floor. Guimel was crying into Dalet's shoulder, who leaned onto a wall for support, pale like the white floor tiles. Migel was pacing back and forth from the urinal to the sink…back to the urinal…then again to the sink…back and forth… 

"We have to again each cook our own food donations!! Why can't we just order a pizza or something!!! WHY!!!???" he kicked the urinal, causing him to jump around the room yelling "Ouchie! Ouchie!! OUCHIE!!!" Chesta took his place pacing the bathroom. From the urinal to the sink….back and forth…back and forth… back an….you get the idea… 

"'Cause Folken just damn loves this thing so!! That is why he will make us go…and COOK!!!! I mean….it took me a month to get over the food poisoning from last year, 'cause he makes us taste EVERYTHING so that no one's feelings get hurt!!!! And I am positive Millerna's jello was mushroom flavored, and that Allen put shampoo in his smoothies!!!!!!!" with those words he kicked the sink, and joined Migel in hopping around the bathroom on one foot. 

"The only way we could get out of this is if we faked sick!" Yelled Gatti, who locked himself in a bathroom stall to suffer alone. Guimel lifted his head off of Dalet's tear-soaked shoulder. 

"Heyyy…..that's an idea!" he said. Dalet punched him on the nose. 

"If we are in this, we are in this together!!!!!!!!!" he yelled. "Gather around men!! We need a battle plan!!" he yelled, shaking Chesta, and kicking Gatti's stall door. 

"We ain't going down 'till the end!!" 

And thus the Anti-Picnic Alliance was formed……..   
  


Okay, how was this for a start? In the next chapter, the APA (the Anti-Picnic Alliance) will try and bring their secret plans into life! Read to find out! (and please, review!) 


	2. Gypsies, Rain and Chicken Liver

Hey everyone Hey everyone!! Thank you for the reviews that I got! Wheeee!!! I feel needed!! 

So, here is the next chapter! It may be a little weird, but that's just the way it is, so enjoy and review!!!   
  


Dalet, Guimel and Chesta were sitting at their dining hall table eating, or rather trying to eat lunch. But they just couldn't eat. For two reasons. One being that they were to upset and angry about the Picnic, they other was that they had green chicken liver with bean paste. Which somehow ended up on the daily menu under the heading "Poulet a la Freid"…. Meanwhile, Chesta was making roads in the bean paste with his fork, ending each one with a green mountain of liver 

"What is even the point of making a plan? We have only an a few hours or so…before Folken sends us off to cook…" he mumbled, drowning the little green mountains in the even greener paste. Guimel just moaned, his head on the table. Dalet was fidgeting in his seat, ringing his fork on the side of his glass. 

"Damn it!! Don't give up yet!! A few hours is plenty of time!! We could plan something if only those idiots Migel and Gatti would get their asses over here! WHERE THE HELL ARE THEY!!!!" He yelled, hitting the glass so hard that it shattered, the pieces hitting Guimel in the face. 

"ARGH!! Nooooo!!! I am bleeding! I am dying!!!! Help me!!! I AM IN PAIN!!!!" he screamed, pointing to the tiny bleeding gash on his nose. Chesta threw some of his mountains at him (topped with paste).   
"Shut up, you're fine! You just look like Rudolf the red-nosed……" he paused, looking for the right word "…sheep…" he paused again "..with moldy green hair…." 

Him and Dalet burst out laughing just as Migel and Gatti walked in through the door. Oblivious to all the noise, they carried a huge, tattered, leather-bound book and were conversing in hushed voices. The others stooped yelling and laughing and watched them in curiosity. 

Migel gingerly put the heavy book on the middle of the table as him and Gatti took their seats. 

"Okay, as you might've realized, we have only an hour in order to disrupt this damn Picnic once and or all, and that is sooooo definetely not enough time that we will not even bother to right now!" sighed Gatti. The other three, discluding Migel, sat there in shock. Those two giving up??? No way! 

Migel cleared his throat "But..Ahem…ahem-ahem..ahe-hem… ahe.." Gatti elbowed him "Um…I think you have done that enough times…get on with our point." Migel glared at him, but continued. 

"As I was saying… BUT…we have enough time to just **delay **the Picnic for today, so that we have plenty of time to plan to ruin it FOREVER!!!!!" Everyone else nodded enthusiastically and began giving ideas. 

"We could burn all the food!" 

"We could kill Millerna!" 

"We can hide Folken's clothes!" 

"We can get drunk!!" (Guimel got a few weird stares for that one…) 

"We could bring ants with us!" 

"Ants won't eat the poison that's there dummy!" 

"We could blow up the Vione!!!!" (more stares….) 

Gatti shook his head. "No, none of those. If we do something like that, then Folken will get too suspiscious of us, and will be on the lookout, making it rather hard to make up a good plan to destroy the Picnic. But we need to delay the Picnic with something that will look completely natural. What we need to do is ….MAKE RAIN!!!" Him and Migel smiled at all the other Dragonslayers, proud of their idea. 

Chesta scratched his head. "Um….one problem…seeing as we are nor some kind of Rain Gods, or know anyone who might be a Rain God, we do not have any means of making any rain whatsoever." Gatti and Migel just smiled wider at that. Dalet also scratched his head. "Seeing as you are smiling so much, I suppose you have a plan or something of the sort?" Gatti and Migel just smiled wider. Now it was Guimel's turn to scratch his head. "Um…you guys? You seriously are freaking me out…You look like a couple of Cheshire cats." Migel finally stopped smiling and retorted "And all of you look like fleabag monkeys. Now, on with the plan…Gatti?? Gatti??????" Gatti seemed to be stuck in grin mode. After elbowing him, Migel opened the large book on the table. Gatti joined him, massaging his side. 

"Okay, hear this. We got everything planned out already. We got the book from a gypsy caravan and it is around 300 years old... but that is beside the point. This book is about ancient tribes that specialized in something unusual but magical. Like witchcraft, sorcery and other thingamajigas like that. There were tribes that made floods, tribes that caused droughts, etc. Out of many tribes that tried to make rain, one was particularly succesful. We have all the information about it and its techniques, so listen to this. _One time, many, many moons ago there was a tribe called…_" Gatti leaned down to the open page to take a look "…_Ooogla-Boogla-Sheesh-Boom-Ba, and they strongly worshipped the Rain God._" 

Dalet snickered at that. "What, are we going to do a rain dance or something??" 

Migel nodded happily "YUP!!!" 

Chesta laughed, "Migel, you're funny, you're really funny, you know!!" 

Gatti reached under the table to get a rolled-up roll of parchment. "No, we're serious! We will have to wear the special tribal costumes and do the dance and sing the chant!!! We got everything from the caravan! If it worked for those Shhesh-boom-ba people, then why would it not work for us?" All the other Dragonslayers were mute with shock. Finally Guimel managed to stutter out in a choked voice. "W-what k-kind-d o…of c-ch-chant??" Migel scratched his chin, flipping the dusty pages of the book "Hmm…it is here somewhere…ah! Here we go… Ahem…ahem-ahem..ahe-he-he….ow!" rubbing his side and shooting death glared at Gatti he proceeded. 

"Boonga-wo-chok-chok! 

Gimmo-pim-pim- roo! 

Oola- Hula- zip-zoo-za, 

Chimboozawooloo!!" 

Guimel chocked. Dalet sat motionless. Chesta quietly asked, "What about the dance?" Migel shook his head. "Not telling ya. You will see when you begin to learn it. There are step-by-step instructions here....somewhere... " 

Finally, Dalet snapped out of his frozen state and hoarsely whispered. "And…and.. the costumes, what are they like?" Migel sighed "Well, not that…um…manly, but will have to do I guess. I mean, we have to have the right attire if we want this to work." He finished importantly, just as Gatti was unrolling the huge parchment. "Here are the basic designs." 

Dalet breathed "Oh Good Lord….help us…." As he helplessly stared at the pictures on the canvas. 

Grass skirts…Flower-and-leaf head-dresses…Blue body paint….Hoop nose rings….and much more un-manly stuff... 

"Well, we got the clothes from the gypsies, so let's get dressed and go and practice!!" yelled Gatti and Migel, dragging the other not-so-enthusiastic boys to the change-rooms….   
  
  
  


Okay, I realize that that was weird….but don't blame _me_….well, do blame me if you realy want to, but you can praise and encourage me too… In other words, reviews would be VERY MUCH APPREACIATED!!! Please do review, because seeing as this is not my number one of importance story at the moment, the less reviews I get, the more time it will probably take me to actually get the next chapter up and going. And the opposite- the more, the FASTER!! 

Okay, for now bye ya all, 'till later! 

P.S. the next on-coming chapters will be funnier... but seeing as I do not have that many ideas, your ideas would be very, very, very, very much appreciated! :) thanx!!!! 


End file.
